Blessed One

Happy New Year

2012-01-03T15:52:00.006-06:00

It has been.... forever.

So, here you go.. An update in the form of pictures:

(you're welcome!) (but mostly, thanks for not abandoning me...)

ha!

Pictures with Dianna (who was in the corps at A&M with Stevie) on campus - a walk down memory lane for all of us! (this is just a little sneak peak I shot of my screen - can't wait til these pictures come in...)

More pictures with the Helm family to surprise Mrs. Helm for Christmas (she cried a little - a success!)

A co-worker girls' trip to Canton for relaxation/shopping!

A trip to College Station to watch the Ags play

Denver for Operation Christmas Child at one of the Distribution centers (quite hard work, actually..)

Here we are in the snow (something we never see back home...) (Also, Jenny with dark hair - haha!)

Attending the wedding of our sweet, sweet friends Claire & Jeremy

Lazy days with 2 cute beagles :)

Fun with instagram and a 7 (!) year old Brighton @ Christmas

Happy new year to you all!

oh iPhone..

2011-10-22T07:56:00.003-05:00

I like to text.

No.. that isn't strong enough. I thrive off texting.

And before you pray for my soul and 'tsk tsk tsk' me, know that the thriving part comes from getting to encourage friends by letting them know they are on my mind right THEN.. it comes from texting loving and encouraging words. Sure, you can see from above that I also take care of Mary Kay orders and other things on my phone via text. So, I confess! More than encouragement and love is flowing through my iPhone... there are some dollar signs as well. ;)

Since I did the update this week, I have had quite a load of iPhone drama. It coincided with a trip to Houston in which I really wouldn't have anything to do since I'm here with Stevie, who is attending the 30th anniversary PCCA conference. On the way to Houston, I wondered aloud to Stevie, "I wonder why I haven't heard back from any of my girls... they usually text right back! It just isn't like them to not respond..."

I became very irritated at my phone. I confess I was mad at a stupid phone. I sent emails with screen shots (of all the texts that had sent with no response) to my girlfriends.. And I got emails back proclaiming, "Oh NO! I knew something had to be up when you didn't respond to my text!"

Then came a complication. My texts started going through as Stevie. To people in MY phone.

Then they stopped going through completely. And they had already stopped coming in.

How much time and effort did I put into solving this iPhone conundrum?

How much did I talk about it??

I'm sad to say - I wasted a lot.. TOO MUCH .. of my focus on my electronic device of choice. Time that I could have been quiet and still. Time that I could have been reflecting on how God never malfunctions in my life.

I'm happy to report that while my phone is nearby, I do have it turned off right now. My phone is fixed. But texting can wait. Thank God for the little bits of clarity in my life.

Fall.

2011-10-20T16:23:00.006-05:00

Fall makes me want things. Things that are cozy and comforting.

Things that I can hug to myself with no fear of sweating.

Praise GOD!

dinners with loved ones at cute tables

light jackets

scarves

sigh. so content.

birth.

2011-10-19T00:01:00.004-05:00

Work has been so busy lately.. I find myself a bit of a zombie when I get done with my 12 hour shift.

I'm so fulfilled, though! I love the birthing experience and I'm crazy-blessed to the MAX to get to see that all the time like I do. I have said so many times, "birth just shouldn't work! I mean THINK about it!!".. and it still boggles the mind.

God is big.. and he's good enough to make birth work. And to let me see it time and time again. And to smile with me when I partake in the beauty, wonder, and process.

amen.

Like Incense/Step By Step

2011-08-04T20:25:00.006-05:00

So many times, I've posted the lyrics to songs that touch me.. speak directly to my heart. I can't believe how long it's been considering my crazy love for music.

Enjoy this one, y'all. Let it ring true and profound within your hearts:

Like Incense/Step by Step

Hillsong

May my prayer like incense rise before You

The lifting of my hands as sacrifice

Oh Lord Jesus turn Your eyes upon me

For I know there is mercy in Your sight

Your statutes are my heritage forever

My heart is set on keeping Your decrees

Please still my anxious urge toward rebellion

Let Love keep my will upon its knees

[Chorus]

Oh God, You are my God

And I will ever praise You

Oh God, You are my God

And I will ever praise You

[Verse 2]

To all creation I can see a limit

But Your commands are boundless and have none

So Your Word is my joy and meditation

From the rising to the setting of the sun

All Your ways are loving and are faithful

The road is narrow but Your burden light

Because You gladly lean to lead the humble

I shall gladly kneel to leave my pride

[Chorus]

[Selah]

To all creation I can see a limit

But Your commands are boundless and have none

So Your Word is my joy and meditation

From the rising to the setting of the sun

[Chorus]

[Bridge]

I will seek You in the morning

I will learn to walk in Your ways

And step by step You'll lead me

And I will follow You all of my days

God is good. All the time.

2011-07-15T14:42:00.002-05:00

All the time! God is GOOD!

Have you ever felt like you're just sitting in a big warm pool of blessing?? Happy and content.. and uber-blessed?!

I can't even begin to list all the ways God has blessed me.. even in the last 24 hours! I just feel it and wanted to share that with y'all. MMMkay?

Love to each of you & hypersensitivity to the blessings in your own lives. Be thankful!

I will give you thanks in the great assembly; among the throngs I will praise you. Psalm 35:18

Paris... ooh la LA!

2011-07-02T23:46:00.009-05:00

Paris was our favorite city along the way.. hands down. Such a charming, romantic place! Delicious food.. romantic language.. slower pace.. yummy wine.. champagne on the Eiffel tower.. what's not to LOVE!?

we. have. arrived.

Notre Dame

Inside Notre dame.. listened to Mass in French while we were there

Left Bank with Notre Dame behind me

my sweet boy

really cool book store

books I bought from street vendors at Notre Dame

in the Conciergerie - where they held Marie Antoinette pre guillotine

Champagne bar at the top of the Eiffel

Eiffel

Our first encounter with the Louvre!

Arc de Triomphe

swarms of people at Versailles

Versailles gardens

so many gorgeous Versailles fountains!

On the palace grounds at Versailles

Stevie in a room full of Monet's Waterlillies!

In front of the Opera in my new shoes from Paris :)

London-town

2011-06-28T17:51:00.007-05:00

As we wrapped up a lovely lunch at Chipotle today with Stevie, Vernon informed me that I needed to head home and update my blog. For fear he'll remove me from his list of links on the sidebar of his own blog, I'm now feverishly pulling together my favorite pics from London.

Enjoy!

Stevie in front of Buckingham Palace

Across the street from Buckingham with St James' Park behind us

Recognize this from an album cover?

Stevie in the Underground

I heart Paddington Station

We went to church at Hillson London while we were there.. loved it!

In front of the British Library

Rosetta Stone

In front of the National Gallery

In Trafalgar Square :)

My first glimpse of St. Paul's cathedral - my favorite place in London

The food was amazing everywhere!

Westminster Palace/Parliament

Westminster Abbey

Parliament & Clock Tower

Dublin, Ireland

2011-06-21T22:21:00.006-05:00

In the Garden of Remembrance near our Hotel

In the park at Merrion Square

It's true.

Before dinner, off Grafton Street

Guinness factory/tour, enjoying the local brew

At a Pub Crawl, enjoying traditional music

Re-entering the atmosphere

2011-06-14T14:27:00.005-05:00

It's hot. Really hot.

Central Texas is always that way in the summer... it's as sure a thing as oxygen being necessary for breathing. All but one summer of my life has been in Texas & you start easing into summer in April. Temperatures here are not gentle. And AC is not optional.. it's necessary for survival.

So, being in Europe for the last 3 weeks was a dream come true on many levels. ;) The warmest temp we encountered was bout 82... EIGHTY. TWO. Crazy... oh for it to feel good standing in the sunshine again!! Insert dramatic pose here..

Anyway. We are home, and I must say - missing my annual easing into the temps of summer kinda screwed me up! Don't get me wrong- the temp here is pretty miserable no matter how you look at it.. but jumping 20 degrees in 24 hours makes it seem that much worse. Ok! Glad I got that little rant out of the way. Thanks for listening...

First Stop: Dublin

Second Stop: London

Third Stop: Paris (ooh la la!)

Forth Stop: Kandern, Germany - The pic above is Stevie and I enjoying Kandern Day. We had a blast hanging out with friends who live there!

Stay tuned for stories and pics from each of our stops!

SOLD!

2011-03-12T09:08:00.002-06:00

I'm pleased to announce that the 'amour' banner sold within hours at The Shops!

Comment if you'd like another one made! :)

amour...

2011-03-11T13:43:00.006-06:00

Inspired by my upcoming trip to Europe :)

amour

french/english dictionary pages (with words pertaining to love underlined on each page!)

strips or red fabric holding pages onto black tulle

frame is a vintage window (included)

$46 (available for purchase at The Shops Above Memory Lane)

and a friend asked me if I could make these... um, LOVE them! so. yes. I can make them. :) they turn out so cute no matter what you do!

(also available for purchase at The Shops..)

life on and off the wagon

2011-03-08T15:32:00.004-06:00

Who needs to get back on the wagon?

I do.

Think those cute kicks will help??

Seriously, though.

Would they?

(hahaha... just kidding!)

I have always been a prize oriented gal. "If I accomplish this.. I get that. (or) I get do that." Whatever 'that' is.

If I get back on the wagon and lose the pounds I want to lose, what do you think my prize should be?? I need inspiration, folks!

Comment and let me know what you think!

new works of heart

2011-02-22T22:29:00.001-06:00

So, I have been searching for inspiration.. and I've found it in the form of vintage windows!

I hit the jackpot and randomly found a man (on Craigslist while hunting for vintage doors for God knows what reason..) who does all sorts of 'salvage' work! He gave me a crazy deal on a dozen windows & my banners are just screaming to be paired with these cool finds!

Old books + Old windows = love & endless history!

This one (below) had so many layers of paint.. I instantly fell for it. How many people try to create this look of layered paint?! Holy. Moly.

My dream for this window was a baby boy name (because one of the most recent layers of paint is a beautiful baby blue!).. and Luke kept popping into my mind for some reason.

pages from a vintage Christian childrens' book

black lettering with distressed black backing

torn/distressed cotton ribbon in a linen tone

hung on black tulle & tied to window frame

((can be found at The Shops and purchased for $60))

Texas Fight. Words you won't get out of this Baylor girl very easily..

A friend of mine who is an amazing photographer, came to my birthday party and took about a million pictures of us in all our crazy party garb. Priceless.

But. If you're going to put a price on all that gloriousness, I guess it might be found in the form of a 'Texas Fight' banner. .. ... . ... . .. ... if you're into that sort of thing.. ;)

pages from vintage childrens' cowboy story

brown lettering with brown distressed backing

burnt orange ribbon, sheer

tied to hemp strand and affixed to open vintage window frame

((can be special-ordered through this blog or at The Shops. Contact for pricing))

na na na na na na..

2011-02-08T09:41:00.005-06:00

they say it's your birthday..

na na na na na na..

Happy birthday TO you!..

Nothing like starting out your day with the Beatles screaming happy birthday at ya.

That's what I always say.. :)

Some of you probably saw this headband on facebook.. I got it at The Shops Above Memory Lane as a little early bday gift to me/myself/I .. and I tell you what! Everyone LOVES it.. people have come across the room to tell me how much they adore it, in fact!

handmade, people. Go buy one & support a local business! In fact, go ahead and buy TWO. :)

Until this week, we still hadn't gotten anything hung on the walls in our bedroom. So. For a first gift from Stevie, he hung these three gorgeous pics from a shoot we did with his friend Dianna last spring. Check out her pics/blog here. And if you follow this link, there are actually a few pics of Stevie and I featured from last year's shoot. Can't wait to take some more pics with Dianna... she's great!

Anyway, the pics are up in our room.. and I must say, they are perfect there.. They lived in the dining area at our old place. This is so much better!

I had purchased a groupon to Limestone Grille in Boerne, Tx. (with a coupon from groupon.com) that actually ended up costing me no more than the gas for Stevie and I to drive there. Amazing. Above is a pic of the appetizer bread and this amazing cheese spread.. it was a miracle that I was able to show any type of self-constraint! ;)

This pic is my entree.. The yellow fin tuna stack with some crazy cool spinach (can't remember exactly how they said it was prepared, but I had never had anything quite like it) and cous cous. Amazing. Paired it with a Torrentes (Argentine white wine).. really and truly you should eat here next time you're wandering through the Texas Hill Country. You won't be disappointed!

I had prayed for a sunny day for my birthday. Even though we live in Texas and get lots of sunshine, February is a gray month historically. And I am here to tell you that I did not see one. single. cloud. the. entire. day.

Amazing. Thank you. Lord, you didn't have to do that, and maybe it was for reasons other than my little prayer.. but I thank you nonetheless.. it made my day & warmed

my body and soul!

ya get ya name in tha papes.. ya famous!

2011-01-31T10:01:00.006-06:00

(That title was for Erin.. haha)

You know what is flattering? and exciting??

When a photographer orders one of your hand made banners because she wants to use it in her clients' photo shoots!

Here is the banner she ordered with an (obviously) happy couple:

Yay for love!

And yay for Al Gawlik Photography!

I think she has a great eye, an amazing personality, and that photography and her are going to be life-long friends..

footprints

2011-01-28T21:59:00.008-06:00

footprints.

That is what our experiences leave.. footprints.

In our lives.. on our hearts..

Sometimes big ones, and sometimes smaller ones, I believe.

But you know what?

Sometimes those little bitty ones can have the most profound impact.

Kennedy Kate

born at 4:24 on January 26

Blessings to Kyle & Jenny C. (the very happy & proud parents)

You will never ever know what it meant to be a part of this special delivery...

I love you both so much.

((go to Jenny's blog to read the birth story!))

obsession

2011-01-13T22:05:00.007-06:00

so, i posted a skirt from a shop on etsy.com the other day..

and i have to admit that i'm on there CONSTANTLY... truly.. i am obsessed! ;)

so, here are some other super-cute finds (enjoy!!)

tons of fun Austen quotes at "Brookish".. how romantic.. ((sigh))

isn't this breathtaking?! I MUST find a reason to wear such a stunning creation! .. and find disposable income to buy said creations.. (ahem) Oh well.. check this out at Ouma's shop

Stevie and I actually have this print (framed very similarly to this one) in red sitting in our bedroom.. i dig it. :) from thebigharumph

i actually just emailed this one to my bff, lamenting the fact that this is really just a glorified, fancified fanny pack.. (double sigh) and yet i adore it.. love or hate it, you can find many more at Kinies..

please let me know what you think.. i need feedback!

wow

2011-01-11T21:50:00.002-06:00

OH MY GOODNESS.. I love this skirt!!

Click here to check out this and other gorgeous creations..

crazy-awesome weekend..

2010-12-12T17:52:00.007-06:00

Have you ever had one of those extremely fun but oh-so-full weekends? Where you gab with tons of friends, eat amazing food (and lots of it..), and smile so much your cheeks hurt?!

That was my weekend.

Phenomenal..

Exhausting.. but so worth it!

Friday, we had the day off, and Stevie went to my parents' house to do a few things to help my dad out. I tidied up some things around the house and organized some stuff post-Budafest. Then we partook in the Deacon/Staff Christmas Party. Delicious food. That reminds me.. there is one lady I need to corner and get her recipe for this ridiculously saliva-inducing salad..

Anyhoo.. ;)

Saturday was an all out CLEANfest. All the things I'd been procastinating, like cleaning the floors, HAD to be done. Baby shower #1 for this weekend was afoot, afterall! That went from 4ish to 9:30ish... friends from work, we were all dying to run our mouths and have a blast together with no fear of having a call-light to answer! ;) Baby Boy on the way for my dear friend Shannon... we poured out our love in the form of gifts and wonderful food & company.. a fabulous time had by all except my beagle, Molly. She was a bit terrified of all the children who descended upon casa Helm. Most of her time was spent under the bed in our guest room. Poor gal.

Sunday came and baby shower #2 for the weekend was up to bat! Jenny C is having a baby girl, and we were eagerly anticipating this gathering and her surprise hostess gift! It goes SO perfectly with her nursery decor/color scheme for baby Kennedy that we simply couldn't resist!

The gang arrived and set out delicious food & the cutest cake ever ;) and we oohed and ahhed as she tore through diaper genies, warm baby clothes & cute baby shoes...

This is why God blessed me with this home. I'm sure of it. He wants me to open it to others. To show His giving and loving spirit. Instead of freaking out about the chocolate-covered hands of toddlers heading toward my *totally* un-childproof furniture, I smiled.. because it's just furniture.. it's just stuff. Stuff... seems so unimportant when I call it that.. and that is a truth I want to sink deep into my being this season (and beyond..)

God is good.. all the time.

All the time.. God is good.

!!!

2010-11-01T21:08:00.003-05:00

Baylor Bears WIN!!!

((victory dance))

Man! That's gotta feel GOOD!!

Sic Em, BEARS!!

get em cubbies

2010-10-26T20:51:00.004-05:00

... that's what my husband says - instead of 'Sic em Bears!'...

This other thing he says.. or USED to say before Baylor had a bit of a football revival this season.. was "we are the Baylor Line... we're forty points behind... we'll never catch you anyway, da da da da da DA da da.." and on and on to the tune of my school song.

Yes. This is the same sweet man I speak of so often on my blog.

Hard to believe. I know.

I'm not sure what exactly the point of this post is other than to say how proud I am of my Baylor Bears.. it's been a long time since we've had a season like this. (In fact, we haven't been bowl-eligible since 1995!) It's exciting!

This weekend we play Texas.

And I hope we kick their tails.

the. end.

Green & Gold

2010-10-07T23:49:00.005-05:00

I went to Baylor.. so I have some deep love in my heart for the green and the gold.

I'm blessed to have a few trips lined up this month, the first of which was to Waco last weekend for the Fantastical Church Music Festival (put on by David Crowder, also a Baylor Bear).. While Stevie, Shane, Landon, Parker, and Shelly were learning about Church music through new eyes, I was learning my own lessons.. gaining new perspective..

It was fun being back in Waco.. not that I missed living there, particularly, but just the nostalgia of that time in my life. I set out for the first time, really. There. On campus, in Waco. Not really all that far from 'home'. I can remember my parents driving me to school.. helping me unload the last of my things into my dorm room.. and I can remember *vividly* seeing my family drive away through the blur of tears in my eyes.

You see, I was from a small town.. attended school with the same people from pre-K on through graduation from Hays. It was huge for me to be even the miniscule 100 miles from home on a foreign school campus. Huge.

And this month marks about 10 and a 1/2 years since I left the Waco campus for Baylor's Nursing School in Dallas.. where did THAT time go?! Good grief. I walked around campus with my sister in law, Stephanie.. half glad that college (and all the studying involved) is way behind me.. and half sad, missing the 'campus-life' and my sorority girlfriends and roommates..

But this, my current life, is the open chapter and I must read it.. can't keep flipping back to earlier chapters, though I can learn (with the perspective of distance and some wisdom gained with age) lessons from those earlier chapters.

For now, I'll just enjoy my semi-regular trips to Waco to shop at Spice, drink frozen milky-way's at Common Grounds, and peruse the campus Bookstore.

LOVE this song

2010-09-07T19:56:00.004-05:00

Jason Gray - More Like Falling in Love

Give me rules

I will break them

Show me lines
I will cross them

I need more than
A truth to believe
I need a truth that lives
Moves and breathes

To sweep me off my feet, it's gotta be

More like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance

Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, oh
It's like I'm falling in love

Give me words
I'll misuse them
Obligations
I'll misplace them

'Cause all religion
Ever made of me
Was just a sinner
With a stone tied to my feet

It never set me free, it's gotta be

More like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance

Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, oh
It's like I'm falling in

Love, love, love
Deeper and deeper, it was
Love that made me a believer

In more than a name
A faith, a creed
Falling in love with Jesus brought
The change in me

More like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance

Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, oh
It's like I'm falling

More like falling in love
Than something to believe in
More like losing my heart
Than giving my allegiance

Caught up, called out
Come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, oh
It's like I'm falling in love

It's like I'm falling
(Falling in love)
It's like I'm falling

Thankful Thursday..

2010-08-26T11:22:00.004-05:00

Thankful for her...

It is hard to find anyone on this earth who means more to me than my Erin.

Love you, boo.

wordless. wednesday.

2010-07-21T15:09:00.001-05:00

familiar scent..

2010-07-13T16:30:00.001-05:00

Lately, Stevie and I have had a pile of lumber sitting behind our house, waiting for it to turn into a deck. Each time I walk past it, I smell the delicious scent, and it reminds me how much I loved going with my dad to hardware/lumber stores when I was little. I have always loved the smell of lumber...

That gets me thinking, though! Jesus was a carpenter -- I wonder if the smell of wood made him smile. I wonder how much he loved the feel of it ... how much pleasure did he take in creating each piece of furniture, ladder, etc??

I smile as I sit here and think, "this is something I must have in common with Jesus.."

I'm blessed to know that God took joy in creating me. That He knew me before I was formed in the womb... before the idea of 'me' ever occurred to my parents.. He saved me from the scrap pile and turned me (...not just me - all of us!!) into a masterpiece.

Thank you, God for crafting each of us into creations with purpose!

some down time

2010-07-11T18:00:00.005-05:00

I had an all too dramatic start to my day today... so I am now vegging and looking at random little beauties like this one:

... online. So delicate and feminine, don't you think??

and this:

which can be found here.

The lovely bedding above

A. can be found at

B. is awaiting my purchase at

C. was designed with me in mind at

D. All of the above (at)

Anthropologie... ((sigh)) I've been keeping my eye on this one for quite some time now.

Opinions, please!

2010-07-03T05:31:00.002-05:00

Tell me:

What do you think of this bed?? (The linen, padded portion of the headboard can be removed and covered with your choice of fabric as well...)

Need comments!

Forgotten Foto Friday :)

2010-07-02T05:33:00.004-05:00

This is part of my group studying for the National Certification in Inpatient Obstetrics a couple years ago.. over the largest order of nachos you have ever seen in your LIFE...

(bonded forever through fear and a ridiculous amount of cheese..)

... and here we all are out at Romeo's, celebrating having passed our test and enjoying one another! :)

love, love, love these gals!

grow

2010-06-27T08:34:00.004-05:00

grow, little pink cosmos flowers, GROW!

You remember how when you stuck the little bean in the dirt in a paper cup in grade school how obsessed you became with it? How you wanted to just watch for something, ANYTHING to happen?? I had forgotten completely about that...or I thought I had, until I planted some seeds in this cute little pot the other day. Now, I catch myself frequently walking over to the window where I can see the pot on the back porch... peering out to see if there has been any miraculous leap in the growth curve since the last time I peeked. :) I go out and turn the pot so it will get equal sun exposure on all sides... I moisten the soil as directed.

I wonder if this is how God is... can He not stop looking in on me.. watching me for signs of growth... does He thrill at the sight of green sprouts... or sighing, does He lean over to pick the weeds out of my pot? Is He watering me, wondering if I'll never peek up at Him out of the richness of the soil He has surrounded me with??

God, help me to literally bloom where you have planted me... the soil, let it be rich and fertile... till the land of my heart and soil, so that more growth may occur... that more reaping may take place in the future.. don't allow my roots to rot. You have made me for a purpose... let me reach that potential, that I may bless You and bless others.. You are my God - I love you and give you praise... thank you for loving me back.

New. House!!!

2010-06-25T23:13:00.003-05:00

So, yesterday marked ONE MONTH in our new home.... ((sigh))... we are so very blessed. And it isn't the house that makes us blessed.. I've always been blessed. But lately it feels as though a veil has lifted, allowing me to see much more clearly how blessings have been poured out on me.

From this, the day we signed a contract to build:

to today (!) living in the gloriousness that is our new home. :)

That would be our doggy Molly with my sister, Erin. They really love each other... and they really love our new house. :) I'll get more pics of the new house uploaded soon, I hope! We have a yard now, so I'll get some new pics from outside.

We've been busy unpacking and arranging.. Selling some furniture and buying some.. sealing tabletops and eagerly awaiting the finishing of our deck.. Recently I started displaying my banners in The Shops Above Memory Lane in downtown Buda. SUCH a cute shop. Owned & operated by a Hays and Baylor grad (just like ME!) named Ashley Green. Check out this post on my other blog, as well as her website here.

Forgotten Photo Friday

2010-05-21T09:40:00.003-05:00

Hey! I can't believe I'd forgotten about this one...

This is how cool my Pastor is:

That would be Craig in the center *in red* doing "Thriller"....

I HEART MY CHURCH. :)

Healing Begins

2010-05-16T15:52:00.005-05:00

It has been.... FOREVER.

A song to share with y'all as my 'breaking back in' blog :)

Healing Begins

Tenth Avenue North

So you thought you had to keep this up

All the work that you do

So we think that you're good

And you can't believe it's not enough

All the walls you built up are just glass on the outside

So let 'em fall down

There's freedom waiting in the sound

When you let your walls fall to the ground

We're here now

::chorus::

This is where the healing begins, oh

This is where the healing starts

When you come to where you're broken within

The light meets the dark

Afraid to let your secrets out

Everything that you hide

Can come crashing through the door now

But too scared to face all your fear

So you hide but you find

That the shame won't disappear

So let it fall down

There's freedom waiting in the sound

When you let your walls fall to the ground

We're here now

We're here now, oh

::chorus::

::bridge::

Sparks will fly as grace collides

With the dark inside of us

So please don't fight

This coming light

Let this blood come cover us

His blood can cover us

::chorus::

I recently discovered this song while browsing through iTunes.. a thing I like to do every now & then.. I loved the 'sound' of it instantly, but it wasn't for about a week that I really GOT the depth of the lyrics. I hope you'll dwell on the message of this song with me. Follow this link to Tenth Avenue North's video journal about the song and give it a quick watch.

Forgotten Photo Friday

2010-03-19T20:40:00.003-05:00

These are my sweet friends Vernon and Leigh.. and this is actually a pic from the 'going away' party we had for them just before they moved off to Germany! I miss them mucho, and long to fly overseas and crash at their place..

Look what I can do!

2010-03-16T17:12:00.008-05:00

I made chicken enchiladas from scratch today...

Mmm!

For a gal who 'doesn't

cook' I did alright.. ;)

Wordless Wednesday

2010-02-24T21:57:00.003-06:00

lately.

2010-02-21T22:32:00.005-06:00

Thoughts from... well, lately..

*eternal life begins now.

*maybe this thing we're in now isn't real life. maybe that is what's with Christ... is a piece of me outside of time with Him?

*my parents will not live forever.. at least not in the physical sense.

*would it be better to have naturally curly hair and have to straighten it? or to have naturally straight hair and curl it??

*what am I capable of?

*can I also have hardwood floors in my master bedroom in the new house?

*why on earth would God die for me? and can I die for Him?

*how can I continue to be giving when the person I'm giving to is openly unappreciative?

*how can I love said person more than I love myself??

*am I called to have kids?

*why does the phrase 'I can't' exist in my life??

*do all those cloudy days exist to make me deeply appreciate the sunny ones, like today?!

wordless Wednesday

2010-02-17T21:03:00.003-06:00

today..

2010-02-13T11:18:00.002-06:00

Today has been so beautiful... it's so gray in Austin in February, that I almost don't want to talk too much about the sunshiny days because I don't want to scare them away! I was blissfully able to sleep in, and what a way to start the day!! I'm on call 12 hours today, and as I fell asleep last night (already beyond exhausted from a lot of extra hours at work) I was fearful that my phone would ring at 5 AM... "Jenny?" they would say... "We need you at 7, and we've had 2 call-in's, so you'll be needed all 12 hours, ok? .... In fact, if you could come in early..... .... Hello? Are you there??" Then I would grunt a reply and shed a tear or two... and off to work I'd go.

At least, that's how I imagined my day would start.

In truth, I woke up at 0830 to Stevie arranging the blankets all around me, tucking a pillow in beside me, and letting me know he'd already taken Molly out to go do her business (AND he'd already fed her - blessed be the man who cares for his wife by taking care of the dog in the AM hours...) as he put her on a blanket beside me in bed. *sigh*

So! Morning coffee? Check. Laundry going? Check. Dishes done? Check. Make-up on? Check. Errands run? Check. Sun shining outside?? CHECK!

Today is shaping up to be a great day..

Cloudy

2010-02-05T09:37:00.003-06:00

Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Defined in wikipedia as "a mood disorder in which people who have normal mental health throughout most of the year experience depressive symptoms in the winter..."

This would be a picture of the very gray day outside my window. The forecast said the sun would be out today.... and there was much rejoicing. However, it's almost 10 AM, and all I see are clouds. :(

Symptoms of SAD may include:

difficulty waking in the morning

tendency to oversleep

tendency to overeat (particularly carbs)

weight gain

lack of energy

difficulty concentrating on tasks

withdrawal from friends/family/social activities

*I'd like to note the fact that I have had difficulty waking in the morning my entire life. Just ask my family...*

Oh, gosh. I have to find something else to talk about! I'm getting sad (the regular kind of just plain 'ol sad) just typing all this! I actually sang aloud to my husband "the sun will come out TOMORROW" last night at the sight of a sunshiny ball in the forecast on my iPhone... **sigh**

Strangely enough, I heard the word 'clouds' in a song playing on iTunes just this moment. haha... let me share it with you. It's uplifting and won't lead to a single one of you needing to take antidepressants. Promise.

Cannons

Phil Wickham

It's fallin' from the clouds

A strange and lovely sound

I hear it in the thunder and the rain

It's ringin' in the skies

Like cannons in the night

The music of the universe plays

:Chorus:

We're singin'

You are holy

Great & mighty

The moon and the stars declare who you are

I'm so unworthy

But still you love me

Forever my heart will sing of how great you are

Beautiful and free

The song of galaxies

Reaching far beyond the Milky Way

Let's join in with the sound

C'mon let's sing it out

As the music of the universe plays

:Chorus:

All glory, honor, power is yours, Amen

All glory, honor, power is yours.. forever Amen

:Chorus:

Happy Birthday to me...

2010-01-29T22:02:00.007-06:00

While I am making wishes... while I'm dreaming up things my hubby can 'surprise' me with, :) I'll let you girls in on some of the girly-girl things I'm hoping for this year. The year of my 30th (**gasp**) birthday.. I know, I know. You all thought I was 23, right?! Well, bless your sugary-sweet hearts! 23 is not a year I care to go back to - I'm so blessed and have learned SO so much since then. Praise Jesus! ;)

Here are the high, silly hopes I have for my 30th birthday. (Hey! a girl can wish for anything, right?)

*I'm a big (okay, HUGE) organization nerd. Truth be told, I would have been thrilled if Stevie had filled up a basket with nothing but these for Christmas. (He wouldn't have even had to wrap them! Hours and hours of getting to clean up and organize stuff into these containers would have taken me STRAIGHT to my happy place..)*

*I have a gift certificate to this beautiful place for a facial, thanks to my man. Will he add to the bliss with a mani/pedi combo?? A swedish massage, perhaps?? If you live in the Austin area, you should schedule, like, STAT.*

*I couldn't very well NOT put a purse on my wish list.*

*For work. Really! Stevie bought me the leopard print Dansko's a little over a year ago, and I wear those bad boys every time I work PLUS some of my days off. They are the dad-gum most comfy & freakishly cute shoes you ever saw. ;)*

(By the way! This was my 100th post, so if you made it through to the bottom of my extremely selfish wish list, I salute you! Thanks so much for reading my rambling thoughts. Besos!)

make me over, girls!

2010-01-28T22:11:00.006-06:00

Well, I am caught up on most stuff around the house... no new Grey's episode to watch... Stevie is at work... SO. Here I am, playing with new hairstyles online! :) Pretty fun, every time I do it. If ONLY I was brave enough to go for some of these.

Vote for me, would you?? In the comment box, tell me which is your favorite! (Options are lettered A-F) Then go here and do your own makeover, and I'll vote for you, too.

Wordless Wednesday

2010-01-13T08:35:00.000-06:00

Fellowship

2009-12-19T09:52:00.003-06:00

Fellowship. A strange word, don't you think?

Wikipedia defines it as "referring to individual Christians who are in Christian communion with each other".

Google says it is "family: an association of people who share common beliefs or activities".

Stating that it dates back to the 12th century, Webster's describes fellowship as:

1. Companionship, company

2 a : community of interest, activity, feeling, or experience b : the state of being a fellow or associate

3 : a company of equals or friends : association

4 : the quality or state of being comradely

The word and its meaning are resounding in me this morning because I was blessed to fellowship in many ways yesterday, ending my week in so much beauty of friendship. At work, the unit wasn't terribly busy, and while stocking rooms, arranging things and tidying the unit we were able to have blessed quality time with one another... our time together was heightened by the thrill of a patient coming in and delivering VERY quickly. Isn't it wonderful to be part of a team? I glean so much from them! From their years of experience, from their teachers' hearts... to belong with them means the world to me.

In the evening, I got to join my Sunday School class for our Christmas party. I missed the dinner part, but made the music and light show. It's always a bummer to show up to events for couples when your husband is at work. So, I was a bit reluctant at first. I called Crystal, trying to see if I could meet up with them and try to find the rest of the class together in the dark, pre-music & light show. She was happy to meet/wait up for me so we could find the crew as a team, bless her! She and her sweet hubby and son.... and guys, the evening just flew. Once I was with them... once I was in the midst of my classmates and friends... time changed. We laughed, some of us cried (love you!), and just had a dang blast together. I was all hopped up on coffee and sweets, and I didn't want the night to end! I felt like I was exactly where God wanted me - in the midst of my friends and Him.

Who do you belong with?? How do you fellowship? As a Baptist, I so often think of church 'fellowships' with enormous casseroles and never-ending dessert tables. There is that, but also SO much more to fellowshipping. What about you? Comment and let me know what you think!

proclaiming..

2009-12-15T15:19:00.004-06:00

I made this banner at the request of a friend about a year ago... and with changes in job/life, we just never connected to get the banner to her! There it sat... in my office closet for all these months.. I've decided I just really love this word, and how the whole thing turned out in general. ;) Therefore, it's now going to live with me!

I'm kinda diggin' it on my tree... Thoughts??

You're Here

2009-12-13T14:55:00.002-06:00

Find and buy this song on iTunes... beautiful Christmas song!

You're Here

by Francesca Batistelli

Hold on now, gotta take a deep breath

I don't know what to say when I look in your eyes

You made the world before I was born

but here I am holdin' you in my arms tonight

Noel, Noel

Jesus, our Emmanuel

You're here, I'm holding you so near

I'm staring into the face of my Savior, King and Creator

You could've left us on our own,

but you're here...

I don't know how long I'm gonna have you for

but I'll be watching when you change the world

I look at your hands, they're still so small

Some day you're gonna stretch them out and save us all

Noel, Noel

God with us, Emmanuel

You're here, I'm holding you so near

I'm staring into the face of my Savior, King and Creator

You could've left us on our own,

but you're here

Some day I'm gonna look back on this

the night that God became a baby boy

Some day you're gonna go home again

but you'll leave your spirit and flood the world with joy

You'll be here, I'm holding you so near

I'm staring into the face of our Savior, King and Creator

You could have left me on my own

but you're here, you're here

Hallelujah, you're here

Tradition

2009-11-25T08:08:00.003-06:00

So, most of you know - I married an Aggie. Aggies are A-L-L about tradition. When Stevie and I started dating (almost 10 years ago - that doesn't make a girl feel old... *gulp*), I was a sophomore at Baylor, and he was a Junior at A&M. He had made it through the 'fish' and 'pisshead' years of the Corps, and was enjoying life as an upperclassman. A member of the Ross Volunteers (big, big deal to those of you who don't know much about A&M or the Corps), he asked me to the RV Ball as our first 'real' date. I had asked him up to Waco for a viewing of me, dressed as a man (ha!), performing in All University Sing with my sorority just about a week before he showed up on my apartment doorstep in his dress whites, a single red rose in hand. I tell you what... God knows everything. Everything. And one thing I know in my life story is that I would have transferred to A&M that year if they had had a Nursing program. (They have one now!) But it was not meant for me to transfer to A&M and be further distracted by this cute boy who would become my husband. :) I moved to Dallas to finish my Nursing BSN, and Stevie continued to ask me to RV, Aggie Band, and other A&M functions. Aggie football games are one of my absolute favorite things on this Earth. The atmosphere, the yells... midnight yell the night before... I adore tradition, and I just ate it all up!

As far as Thanksgiving & family tradition goes - in the past, we've always eaten at my parents' on Thanksgiving day and Stevie's parents' the day after, so we could watch 'THE game'. Now that it's back on Thanksgiving day, we're doing the Knight-Helm shuffle. ;) We make it work. I bring up family because I want to tell you something. Each year, my daddy sits down (after turning the TV off) and asks us all to go around the table and say what we're thankful for. My mom and I always end up misty-eyed or full-on crying. My brothers act disinterested, but they participate. Then the food is blessed, and we dig in. I think at some point in each dinner since my mom became a nurse, we've heard a 'nurse story'.... My dad used to gripe about how this was inappropriate, but now that I've been a nurse for a while I think he's resigned to the fact that we have pretty awesome stories. :) That, and he's outnumbered....and I think he secretly enjoys it.

I could go on and on, but I'm interested in something: What are some of your traditions? What are the things that you anticipate each Thanksgiving? What makes your heart swell?

Thanksgiving

2009-11-22T08:24:00.003-06:00

I'm sitting here playing on my laptop, trying to wake up my tired eyes on this sleepy Sunday morning... I'm struck with the fact that I have not been openly thankful for many things - enough things lately... Am I complacent and bored? Am I spoiled and rotten? Please, precious Lord, help me to avoid these! Am I gracious, kind, and utterly thankful? Not often enough. Gracious God, please lead me to these... help me to live there, in that state of thanksgiving.

Let me give thanks now, Lord --

+ for my dear family

+ for the saving grace of my belief in Christ Jesus (& for His willingness to die for me)

+ for friends who strengthen and challenge me

+ to my parents for encouraging me in so many endeavors throughout life

+ for blessing me with a truly Godly husband who isn't afraid to lead our marriage in a Christ-centered manner

+ for my job

+ for a home with warmth or ac whenever I need either

+ for the new and happy marriage of my sister

+ for taking Granny home to be with you in Eternity - for not letting her linger here, suffering

A song always comes to my mind this time of year - a song that makes me focus on all the many blessings poured out. :) The chorus is this:

Count your blessings, name them one by one

Count your blessings, see what God hath done

Count your blessings, name them one by one

Count your many blessings see what God hath done!

Today..

2009-11-08T16:07:00.004-06:00

.. is the perfect day for this:

AND this:

to love

2009-10-11T20:13:00.003-05:00

To love as God loves... that is my prayer. I asked to be taught to love as He loves just last night. He provided a couple lessons the following morning in the form of a Sunday school lesson by Trisha and a sermon by her husband.

His ways are SO not my ways. While I might avoid people or situations, I think God would be beside Himself at the thought of getting to see that person/be in that situation again. While I might sigh with relief at getting to 'escape' from something for a bit, I think God weeps at the separation. Things that make me cringe and stretch (ie grow) don't affect Him in the same ways. I have had a dawning in the last 24 hours, and God has shown me that I don't love. I just don't! And I may never love the way He does - this side of Heaven, anyway. I'm an overachiever, and it frustrates me to admit when I fail at something. But I have failed to truly love others as God has called me to.

Please, please don't read this and think 'who?!' 'Man, who did Jenny drop the ball with??' There is no ONE name, sadly. I have failed to love each and every one of you in the deeply Christ-like manner I've been called to. *sigh* I --heart-- you all.

Doesn't that sound silly?!

If I'm totally honest, I think I've only 'hearted' my fellow man. May God bring me to the place where I --LOVE-- you all.

Jesus. Saves.

2009-09-29T20:28:00.004-05:00

These are words that can sum up my life. Jesus. Saves. The end. Period.

I would be nothing without Him.

Jesus Saves

Travis Cottrell 'Live'

Hear the heart of heaven beating

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

and the hush of mercy breathing

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

Hear the host of angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King"

and the sounding joy repeating

Jesus saves

See the humblest hearts adore Him

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

and the wisest bow before Him

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

See the sky alive with praise

melting darkness in its place

there is life forevermore in

Jesus saves

He will lift our sorrows, sharing

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

He will die, our burden bearing

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

It is done, will shout the cross,

Christ has paid redemption's cost!

While the empty tomb's declaring

Jesus saves!

Freedom's calling, chains are falling

hope is dawning, bright and true

Day is breaking, night is quaking

God is making all things new

Jesus saves

Oh to grace how great a debtor

Jesus saves, Jesus saves

All the saints who shout together

Jesus saves, Jesus saves!

Rising up, so vast and strong

lifting up salvation's song

the redeemed will sing forever:

Jesus saves!

I LOVE this song - it so speaks to me. I wish to see the sky alive with praise... melting darkness in its place. Jesus, bring your light.

our hope endures

2009-09-26T20:30:00.004-05:00

(My friend, Lauren, sang this song one Sunday at church as a special.... it's beautiful! I had forgotten about it until I heard it playing on the radio randomly one day. Love. It.

I hope you do, too.)

Our Hope Endures

Natalie Grant

You would think only so much can go wrong,

calamity only strikes once.

And you assume that this one has suffered her share,

so life will be kinder from here.

Oh, but sometimes the sun stays hidden for years.

Sometimes the sky rains night after night -

when will it clear??

But our hope endures the worst of conditions,

it's more than our optimism.

Let the earth quake! Our hope is unchanged.

How do we comprehend peace within pain,

Or joy at a good man's wake?

So, walk a mile with a woman whose body is torn

with illness, but she marches on.

Oh, 'cause sometimes the sun stays hidden for years.

Sometimes the sky rains night after night -

when will it clear??

But our hope endures the worst of conditions,

it's more than our optimism.

Let the earth quake! Our hope is unchanged.

Emmanuel, God is with us...

El Shaddai, all sufficient...

We never walk alone,

and this is our hope.....

Our hope endures the worst of conditions -

it's more than our optimism.

Let the earth quake, let the earth quake,

let the earth quake!

Our hope.. is unchanged.

You know?

2009-09-08T23:36:00.003-05:00

You know how they say 'if you want to learn about something, teach it' ?? Well, maybe you've never heard this said! (ha) I can't tell you how many times I heard one of our Youth workers say this while we were still youth, as college students, and even more when we were adults finding our place in ministry at MBC as married folk. It's true. If you know you've got to teach people a lesson on Sunday morning over a section of scripture, you bet you're gonna know it!

This past Sunday, our Pastor & his wife were blessed with a day off. It sounds like they had a great day to themselves, and I'm so happy for them!! I was asked by Trisha to fill in and teach. If you know me to any extent, you probably know that I'm no teacher. At least, I don't see myself as teacher in any way/shape/form. But the lessons books were handed over as I heard myself saying, "yeah, I think I could do that.... yeah, at least 70% sure I could do that" in response....

I lured my sister there with promises of Starbucks, and set out to absolutely nail this lesson - even though I was partly praying only 3 people would be there! My TEAMS group was praying for me while I prepared, and I could feel it - God blessed me with confidence in the outline and themes.

Sunday morning comes, and I get up and get ready feeling only minimally nervous. This is a HUGE point in the 'God is totally with Jenny' column. I am not a person who is calm before public speaking.... ever. EVER. How can I make this more clear to y'all?? ;) I leave at 9, and leisurely drive to Starbucks (not forgetting Erin's order) and on to church, sipping the sweet nectar that is the Skinny Vanilla Latte with an extra shot of sugarfree vanilla......

Initially, it is me and 4 other people (including Erin), and I'm thinking "PERFECT. Thanks, God." And then right as I'm getting started (way too close to on time for this class. I recognize this in hindsight. Oops.) another couple walks in. Then another 2 couples. Then 2 single girls. Then a guy. Then another guy. And so on. Our class ended up being 15 people - NO. 16! Luckily, I'm in full swing, trying not to read straight from my notes. Or talk too much with my hands. So, I don't realize during the lesson just how full our class is while nervous Nelly (that would be me) is teaching. My voice only gets shaky like twice. Ok, maybe more like 5 times. And while I did finish way too early, I DID teach a full 30 minutes! God must have wanted us to fellowship and promote intimacy within the class. That's my only working theory.

I learned quite a bit prepping for this lesson, and even though it had it's weirdness I actually enjoyed myself - sort of.

Thanks, God, for blessing my class with awesome attendance, and a word from you. Bless us as we try to remember your uniqueness, power & authority. Amen.

Thankful thursday..

2009-08-27T07:55:00.002-05:00

Wow. I haven't been on here in FAR too long.

Today, I'm thankful for:

* a BLAST of a weekend (congrats, Barbie!)

* the budget and all the work Stevie does on that every month

* Nocona living closer to me :)

* a church family that feels the need to adapt in order to meet the needs of it's growing/changing congregation

T.T.Trendy

2009-08-06T17:15:00.013-05:00

So, I've been wasting some time on the laptop.... being lazy & trying to recuperate from an exhausting past week. Thought I'd share some fall trends I'm excited about!

The Long Boyfriend Blazer

J. Crew

How freakin' cute is this?! Hmmm... how does one get this into the October budget? My gosh - I love the whole ensemble!

Tribeca Patent Tote

Coach

Ok, girls... raise your hand if you love patent leather! And who on this green (brown, if you live in Austin) Earth doesn't look great in purple?!

Much. Love.

GB "eye candy"

Dillards

Eye candy indeed!

Shoes have been a long-time love of mine.

I'm already thinking about how cute these would be with red toenails peeping out!

Ladies Cord Vest

Old Navy

Hmmm. I'm thinking cute short sleeved shirt or funky button up under this... Actually, the possibilities are endless! :)

Red printed parasol

Luna Bazaar

RED. One of my favorite things about fall is the rich colors! After a VERY long summer of white & brights (and don't get me wrong - I love those... it's just that summers in Austin are so. long.) it's nice to see some richness & depth of color return.... sigh. I cannot wait to carry this parasol!

Thankful thursday..

2009-08-06T13:01:00.002-05:00

Thankful, so thankful for...

..friendships

..a husband who is giving

..that Erin is happy and getting married

..God being bigger than any Earthly drama we can dream up :)

Then

2009-08-01T23:08:00.003-05:00

Then

by Brad Paisley

I remember tryin' not to stare

the night that I first I met you.

You had me mesmerized.

And three weeks later in the front porch light,

takin' forty-five minutes to kiss good night.

I hadn't told you yet..

but I thought I loved you then.

..chorus..

And now you're my whole life

Now you're my whole world,

and I just can't believe

the way I feel about you, girl.

Like a river meets the sea

stronger than it's ever been

We've come so far since that day

And I thought I loved you ... then.

I remember takin' you back to right where I first met you.

You were so surprised.

There were people around, but I didn't care

I got down on one knee right there and once again

I thought I loved you then.

..chorus..

I can just see you with a baby on the way.

I can just see you when your hair is turnin' grey.

What I can't see is how I'm ever gonna love you more,

but I've said that before.

..chorus..

And we'll look back some day

at this moment we're in

and I'll look at you and say..

'and I thought I loved you then'

Baby sister..

2009-07-29T00:01:00.002-05:00

My little sister got engaged last monday night! How exciting! It was such a blessing to be a part of the big night.... These pictures are of Cara and I leading her up the path & then taking off her blindfold and letting her see her love waiting under the gazebo! Romantic? Um, YES!

Congrats Erin! I'm already having so much fun helping you plan! Can't wait to try on dresses with you! :)

new song...

2009-07-21T22:23:00.004-05:00

King of the World

*by Point of Grace*

Spinning around on the tops of his feet

smiles of the angels could not be so sweet

wide blue eyes and piggy tail swirls

she's her daddy's girl

'Cause he knows the jokes that always make her laugh

takes her for ice cream instead of her nap

at the end of the day by the light of the moon

they turn up the music in their living room

and she yells..

Dance me, dance me around

'til our feet don't ever touch down

there's nothin' better than being your girl

and if I am your princess, then Daddy

You are the King of the world

It's funny how life moves in circles of time

to think not so long ago that face was mine

houses get smaller, we take different names

but some things in life stay the same

Dance me, dance me around

'til my feet don't ever touch down

there's nothin' better than being your girl

and if I am your princess, then Daddy

You are the King of the world

Someday she'll go off, find a life of her own

marry a good man, and make a happy home

until she comes back and sees with those same eyes

what time cannot disguise

She walks through the door with that look on her face

'cause daddy's brown hair has all turned to gray

they talk for hours, they cry and they laugh

watchin' old movies and thinkin' back

Just as she turns to go

She says, Hey Dad, how 'bout one for the road?

Dance me, dance me around

'til my feet don't ever touch down

Dance me, dance me around

'til my feet don't ever touch down

'cause there's nothin' better than being your girl

oh, no, there's nothin' better than being your girl

and if I am your princess then, Daddy

you are the King of the world

..spinning around on the tops of his feet

smiles of the angels could not be so sweet..

Thrilling Thursday

2009-07-02T10:10:00.002-05:00

Today I am thrilling in the fact that...

~God is working in me

~I am free, free indeed

~That a new budget month is starting & we get to eliminate the 'debt elimination' category!

~That we have a group we meet with regularly that cares about & encourages us

~God motivates me through music

~My little sister is in love with a good guy :)

~My daddy is doing better

Thrilling Thursday

2009-06-25T10:08:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thrilled

~ to have my memory verse

~ to be DEBT FREE

~ to be working out 2 days in a row (ha!)

~ did I mention being debt free? ;)

Thrilling Thursday

2009-06-18T09:03:00.002-05:00

Today I'm thrilled:

To have survived an emotionally and physically challenging week..

That I'm going to be debt free TOMORROW.

This was my memory verse this week. It was much needed, and God gave it to me for a reason...

"Those who trust in the Lord are like Mt. Zion which cannot be shaken but endures forever. As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people both now and forevermore."

Psalm 125:1-2

To answer..

2009-06-09T23:01:00.002-05:00

To answer Jenny C's question:

Ain't nothin' like ~

making supper with my family and visiting on the back porch for hours with some of our favorite music playing...

starting your day off with a great workout...

knowing Jesus is coming back someday...

my Granny's Italian Creme Cake...

getting lost in a great book...

the anxiety coupled with peace when you're smack-dab in the middle of God's will...

making something with your own hands...

Granzin's chopped beef sandwich and sweet tea...

having a few great inside jokes with a friend...

What are your "ain't nothin' like"s???

Thrilling Thursday

2009-06-04T14:47:00.004-05:00

Today, I am thrilled...

~ to have had a great workout

~ that Stevie and I got to spend time together getting groceries & grabbing lunch together

~ that I'm off ALL DAY

~that my superhero-husband killed the only roach I've seen in our apartment for YeArS! (..had convinced myself that it had crawled into the closet & into my clothes... UGH!)

~ that we'll be out of debt in 28 days!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-03T10:41:00.001-05:00

Gracious!

2009-05-29T20:58:00.003-05:00

My goodness, I've been a blogging failure as of late. So Sorry!!

I missed my very own 'Thrilling Thursday', but I would like share something that thrills me anyway. I've been reading a book lately - a memoir in which a family of women have some truly horrible relationships - and it's made me realize what amazing men God has very strategically placed in my life.

I have many very Godly uncles who have been in my life since the start....

Godly Grandfathers who adored their wives....

a father who is beyond devoted to his children, who taught me never to quit, and what a Godly husband should look like....

Then I found the man God had designed for me - he is like my daddy in so many ways, and he cherishes me....

Marrying Stevie earned me a father-in-law who respects me & seems very glad that I married his son, as well as two awesome brothers-in-law (and Grandfathers-in-law!) who I love very much....

I had images of what Godly marriages look like (and how they tick) to model my own marriage after. It just blows me away how God has prepared me and grown me to be a wife. A happy wife who feels fulfilled. Whose love tank is full. Who is getting laugh lines.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow

Praise Him all creatures here below

Praise Him above, ye heavenly host

Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost

amen.

wordless wednesday

2009-05-27T10:07:00.000-05:00

wordless wednesday night

2009-05-21T02:05:00.001-05:00

thrilling thursday

2009-05-14T09:42:00.002-05:00

Today, I am thrilled...

~ to have slept in.. in my own bed..

~ to have spent awesome quality time with my husband last night

~ to have gotten to hang out with Shelly, Erin, Momma, Jill & Ehran, and Sabrina

~ to know my destiny

wordless wednesday

2009-05-13T15:29:00.002-05:00

..thrilling thursday..

2009-05-07T21:11:00.002-05:00

I've decided I'm going to start posting 'Thrilling Thursday' each week. My hope is that it will be a blessing to you and a challenge to me to truly thrill in this life... rise above just living and truly thrill.

Today, I was thrilled to..

* help a friend out by working a couple hours for her

* have the afternoon to myself ~ worked on my tan and got a pedicure

* sit down in a quiet house with my Guatemalan coffee and watch Grey's Anatomy

..wordless wednesday..

2009-05-07T00:34:00.001-05:00

The Rainy Day

2009-04-28T09:03:00.002-05:00

Discovered this beautiful poem on my friend Melanie's Blog and found it to be very applicable. You, my friends in very different places in life, can probably still relate, too.

The Rainy Day

The day is cold and dark and dreary;

It rains, and the wind is never weary;

The vine still clings to the moldering wall,

But at every gust the dead leaves fall,

And the day is dark and dreary.

My life is cold and dark and dreary;

It rains and the wind is never weary;

My thoughts still cling to the moldering Past,

But hopes of youth fall thick in the blast,

And the days are dark and dreary.

Be still, sad heart! and cease repining;

Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;

Thy fate is the common fate of all,

Into each life some rain must fall,

Some days must be dark and dreary.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

... behind my clouds is the sun still shining! On the other side of the darkness of this life (and all the shadows thereof) is Christ Jesus, shining in ALL his resplendent glory.

pretty in pink

2009-04-22T10:36:00.003-05:00

Granny showing off her nails pre-race at the Tyler RFTC. Isn't she beautiful??

She lived to the age of 85... maybe this picture, taken at the Tyler 'Race' was prophetic... I don't know. 85 years behind her, she faces forward into eternity. :) I think if I was facing eternity coupled with the Glory of the Lord, I'd have to sit down, too!

It's time for healing

2009-04-21T11:27:00.007-05:00

Last week, my mom, Erin and I headed for Tyler. We were on a very serious detail. The thing is, we were rushing to the bedside of my Granny, who was (quite suddenly) rapidly deteriorating. We were hurrying to her deathbed. It's a hard thing, walking in the room... I'm a nurse, and I'm used to opening doors to patients' rooms.... but this is different. Just the sight of this person you have loved your whole life rocks you. In an instant you know just how real it all is -- just how deeply you love them. And you don't know if you should hug and kiss everyone else in the room first... and you don't know what to say... and you sit and hold your Granny's hand and talk to her, unsure whether she is even hearing you despite what the nurses say... and she's beautiful, even lying there dying... and you count her breaths per minute, scared to death that this will be the minute it stops.... I learned a lot about how people cope, how they each say goodbye in their own way. Momma became a loving, daughter-in-law, nurse for Granny. She and I turned Granny and rearranged her pillows.. moved her blankets depending on how warm she felt. Erin brushed Granny's hair, then fixed her up a bit... Then she and I massaged her hands, arms, feet and legs with lotion. Uncle Dwain told stories.. It was one of the saddest, but also one of the most holy & beautiful experiences of my life. I won't share all of the details on here.. some things are sacred.. but I will tell you -- my Granny is with Jesus. and He is all she needs. Next time I see her, we'll be meeting Him in the air. Praise God.

This song spoke to me the last few days. I hope it moves you as well.

Whatever You're Doing

Sanctus Real

It's time for healing

time to move on

It's time to fix what's been broken too long

Time to make right

what has been wrong

It's time to find my way to where I belong

There's a wave that's crashing over me,

and all I can do is surrender

..chorus..

Whatever You're doing inside of me

it feels like chaos, but somehow there's peace

and it's hard to surrender to what I can't see

but I'm givin' in to something Heavenly

Time for a milestone

time to begin again

reevaluate who I really am

Am I doing everything

to follow Your will

or just climbing aimlessly over these hills

So, show me what is You want from me

I give everything -

I surrender to

..chorus..

Whatever You're doing inside of me

it feels like chaos, but somehow there's peace

though it's hard to surrender to what I can't see

I'm givin' in to something Heavenly,

something Heavenly

Time to face up

clean this old house

time to breathe in and let everything out

that I've wanted to say

for so many years

time to release all my held back tears

..chorus..

Whatever you're doing inside of me

it feels like chaos, but I believe

You're up to something

bigger than me

larger than life,

something Heavenly

Whatever you're doing inside of me

it feels like chaos, but now I can see

this is something bigger than me

larger than life

something Heavenly

It's time to face up,

clean this old house.

Time to breathe in and let everything out...

weak

2009-04-16T10:36:00.002-05:00

The phone call came last Thursday... I had been at the gym, doing my thing. Went home, decided to go tan a bit, and got a plea of a text message from my cousin to have my dad call his mom. What the heck? That means it's Granny, and where did this come from?! Daddy sounded ok on our first conversation, but when I spoke to him again later, it sounded much more serious. I've decided that some of the worst words to hear are, "Jenny. Granny's sick."

That took me from normal calm, with a pinch of 'what in the world is going on in East Texas?' straight to gut-twisting 'oh no - it's happening.' Hurried phone calls were made to my husband, mom and sister - my best friends on Earth. Tears shed. Prayers spoken.

I feel so weak - like all the emotion of the last week has wiped me. I have been pounded with anticipatory grief. My friend, Amy, emailed me (as so, so many of you have... with sweet, sweet words!) and shared this verse with me -- "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 I read the whole chapter, and it's rich.. y'all should look it up.

Here are some other verses that speak volumes:

"I am under vows to you, O God; I will present my thank offerings to you. For you have delivered me from death and my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before God in the light of life." Psalm 56:12-13

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. He who was seated on the throne said, 'Behold! I am making everything new!'" Revelation 21:4-5

"I did not see a temple in the city, because the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are its temple. The city does not need the sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light and the Lamb is its lamp. The nations will walk by its light, and the kings of the earth will bring their splendor into it. On no day will its gate ever be shut, for there will be no night there." Revelation 21:22-25

Go, Granny. Run to Him who is beyond able... to wipe away tears, to heal our wounds, to pass away old orders. I will see you again. We will be with Him, worshipping for eternity where there is no night. I look forward to seeing you there, singing your heart out. Love you, Granny. No longer 'racing for the cure' on Earth - just racing toward the cure that is Christ Jesus.

Lord, draw her into your fold. Give her a new body, and give her kisses for me. Love you. In the name of my merciful Savior, amen.

flight

2009-04-03T23:10:00.002-05:00

Tonight, while driving to my parents' house, I saw the most beautiful thing. The sun was setting, so the clouds were all pinks & purples - one of my favorite sights! I'm driving along - thinking about how Molly is shedding in the backseat and how I'm going to have to clean the inside of the windows because she's mooshing her wet nose against the glass - and I glance up at one point and see TONS of migrating birds flying in the most beautiful formation. It made every silly thought in my head totally halt.

What struck me about the birds was that they weren't in a perfect V with one bossy guy in front. Their form was so fluid... they flowed together as a unit... with one purpose, but as distinct individuals. They weren't flapping those wings in unison - believe me, I was watching for that! I can't explain to you why that made my crazy brain jump to the body of Christ, but it did. Sometimes they formed a V, other times they resembled an S... but I was smacked with the fact that I often get stuck on how things should look. I think I want the perfect V formation pretty much all the dang time. But what God wants from me is to fit into the flowing, sometimes S that is the moving body of Christ. Heading in the right direction, with one distinct purpose - knowing where my 'true north' is.

eye of the beholder

2009-03-16T09:32:00.005-05:00

My sister, Erin, does an amazing job as a Stylist. Beautician. Hairdresser. Whatever today's word is for the person who does hair & make-up. She has hit the nail on the head when it comes to career choices that suit her perfectly. I wanted to share a few examples of hair she has styled. Some pics are cuts, some up-do's, some just for giggles.

Enjoy!

Life is an endless struggle of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hair stylist you like. -- Author Unknown

A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who look like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. -- Steve Martin

If truth is beauty, how come no one gets their hair done in a library? -- Lily Tomlin

I suppose that's the European way, dangerous and hairy. -- Jason Statham

The hair is the richest ornament of women. -- Martin Luther

Falseness often lurks beneath fair hair. -- Danish proverb

How easily a hair gets into the butter! -- German proverb (ha!)

Gray hair is God's graffiti. -- Bill Cosby

Better wise language than well combed hair. -- Icelandic proverb

so close we can TASTE it

2009-03-09T15:27:00.003-05:00

When Stevie and I got married, a mountain of debt to Baylor joined us in our Holy matrimony. Soon to follow was the mini mountain of Pharmacy school debt. Our total when Stevie graduated as a Pharmacist was over $100,000. Yikes.

He had already been listening to Dave Ramsey for a bit, but I was still resistant to the sacrifices Dave was calling Americans to make in order to attain financial freedom. Stupid of me. Why I was so stubborn to start out on the best path we could possibly follow with our money, I don't know. If I could go back, I'd jump on board with a freakish intensity and move as quickly as God would allow us toward being DEBT free!

Today, Stevie and I have paid off $120,449.65! We owe just under $28,000. Now, remember this is all school and about $10,000 we owed on the Civic when he graduated. Thanks go to God that we didn't have any credit cards....The first thing we paid off was the car - bought out early from our lease. (We'll never lease another car - ever.) I don't mind telling y'all these numbers because we have come SO far! If we can do it - SO CAN YOU! :)

The seeming impossibility of ever getting our debt paid off may have been what discouraged me. I can just imagine the devil whispering to me:

'you'll never get all that paid off.'

'God doesn't care if you have some debt...'

'what makes you think you can accomplish anything like this?'

'your friends are all gonna think you're crazy...'

The truth. The truth tells me (in scripture!) that the borrower is slave to the lender. We are not called to shackles. We aren't called to fear. We are co-heirs with Christ, called to complete freedom in our Savior!

This May or June, Stevie and I will be able to raise our faces to heaven and praise God for bringing us to financial freedom.... a place where our money isn't tied up, making us slaves to the bank. When our money is freed up, we can give where we're called to give. We can go where God calls us to go.

God, you are so good. So beyond worthy of any praise I can muster. Bless you, Father, for saving me. Praise you, God, for lifting me up and for making my path clear before me. You deserve every ounce of credit for how far Stevie and I have come.... for how close we are to being DEBT FREE! I pray right now, that you would strengthen Dave Ramsey and his ministry. I pray that you would lift their spirits and inhabit their offices/arenas with a palpable presence. Thank you for the message he brings to Americans. Continue to reveal scripture to Dave that applies to your plan for our finances. He is a brilliantly shining light in a dark time. May mine & Stevie's testimony bless others and encourage them!

In the mighty and saving name of Christ Jesus,

Amen.

Friends, if you have any debt of if you're just curious about this Dave guy - PLEASE check out Financial Peace University. Stevie and I are taking a group at our Church through it for the second time. Watch this video for a preview. Who knows? Maybe God is calling you to lead a class at your church or with friends!

What's the deal?

2009-03-04T09:59:00.001-06:00

Y'all pray for my motivation. It seems to have left me for a time... :(

photo booth

2009-02-22T13:41:00.007-06:00

One of my favorite things about our laptop is the application called Photo Booth. I have taken a ridiculous amount of pictures... of myself... I guess it brings out the narcissist in me! Anyway - here are a few of my favorites. (newest to oldest)

at home

a shot of my super cute, hot pink tights

me & miss molly

christmas decorations

what i would look like with shorter hair

the tiara Brighton loaned me for halloween

me.. going green

in a pink poodle skirt of Nocona's

lazy day

flowers in my window

playing with light & photo booth features!

what. on. earth.

2009-02-17T21:57:00.003-06:00

Stupid thing I did tonight:

Came home after dinner with my parents & hanging out watching NCIS. Decided after walking Molly, changing into pajama pants and organizing a few things around the house that it'd be a great idea to go ahead and grind some deer sausage for a meat queso I need make in the next couple days. Grind down two of three sausages, and on the 3rd ALMOST finish when I somehow jam the blade. I can't get the lid off. Can't get the container off the base (stupid safety features!) unless I can get the lid off. Decide to wedge a butter knife (or 2!) between the lid and the basin. Accomplish this feat:

Initially: felt shock. After: anger. A bit later: used a spoon to get the sausage out and decided something like this might earn me an honorable mention Darwin award, laughed, took a pic with my phone and emailed it to Stevie & my mom. No amount of brute force is getting the lid off that thing. I'm glad none of y'all were here tonight to witness my idiocy.... somehow it doesn't seem as severe just sharing the pic. Molly thinks I'm crazy - I'm sure of it.

Quick note

2009-02-15T22:12:00.002-06:00

This chick could not be prouder of her friends who ran the Austin Marathon today! Jenny C & Patricia.... y'all freakin' rock.

meanness

2009-02-10T08:43:00.004-06:00

Last night at my Bible study, we were studying Esther 3. Beth was going over Haman and his character. I almost skipped last night, but I'm SO glad God led my car over there....

We focused almost completely on meanness. How it has a history - always. (Haman's hatred of Mordecai went way back to King Saul...) How it rises from a perceived threat. (She encouraged us as women to stop and evaluate what it is we feel threatened by when we feel a wave of meanness well up in us...) And, thank you Jesus, how it is curable.

As women we can be very mean to one another. Whether as moms, sisters, friends, or strangers. And don't think the meanness is only 'out there' in the secular world. We are mean to one another in all arenas - the Church included. The place where love should be most easily exemplified is a place where we are at our meanest. If I am stepping on any toes here, know that they might need stepping on. God got up on top of both my feet last night. He skipped over toes altogether! In women's ministry, I've seen plenty of meanness. Sadly, I haven't always been an observer only.

Lord, please forgive me for my mean nature. It's in there, I know it. I hate it when it wells up. Bless you - I believe it is curable. In the mighty name of Jesus I ask you for a revival in the hearts of the women of my church... Please start with me. Help me to find the root of my meanness. Cure me. Help me to work through it with you guiding me to all the roots I need to pull.... they are poison. I pray, Father, that you would pull the ones so deep I can't get to them. I am humbled to remember that nothing is beyond your grasp.

In the most powerful name of my Jesus.. Amen.

the shack

2009-02-08T14:56:00.004-06:00

Have you ever read something & immediately known that you NEEDED your friends to read it, too, so you could discuss it with them??? This has happened to me a number of times, most recently with The Shack....

I am completely alert and oriented to person, place, time & situation.

I am grounded in my Biblical knowledge of God and who He is.

I understand that this book is not gospel. Let's just get that out there.

I'm not placing this book out there as something better than the Bible. It just isn't so. However, I can tell you that I have been significantly affected by this book. When initially introduced to the story, my mom was telling me about a friend who had read it. We happened to be wandering through Target together, shopping for who even knows what at this point... Upon arrival at the book section of the store, she skimmed the back, filling me in & peaking my interest, and placed her copy in the basket.

I thought to myself from the very first mention that this sounded like an awesome story, and I knew I wanted to read it. I finally got through with a couple tests & another book, and I settled in to begin the journey to 'the shack' once we got back from Guatemala. I knew it started off pretty sad - I'd been well warned. But, people, let me tell you, "don't put the book down. Please, please keep going!"

I was convicted of religious stereotypes I didn't even know I had... I was blessed to see love personified in three beings that I don't usually picture as the Trinity... Judgement was presented to me in a fresh way, and I was forced to look into my own heart... And, y'all! The pictures of redemption just blew me away.

I don't mind telling you, I think chapter 16 was my favorite. I don't have my book right next to me (it's in the car so I can take it to my mom tonight - it's her copy!), but I believe that is the chapter right after Mack's eyes are touched by Sarayu. Don't worry - I'm not giving anything away! I desperately needed a shower, so I just took the darn book with me. Hot water pounding on my back, I read that chapter and I bawled. It was wonderful. In fact, I don't think there was a single chapter I didn't cry in. Love it. It made me yearn for Heaven, where my eyes won't be clouded.... where my brain and body won't be limited...

God, Papa (as the book calls Him), is here. And He isn't just here for each person in part. He is fully present and available for each of us. He craves relationship. I don't think He's all that interested in how many Sundays we get our name counted in the roll at church. I believe He's far more interested in spending time with us.... in talking with us (that involves both parties talking, not just one)... in celebrating/grieving/laughing/crying with us. You name it. He wants to go through it with you. He isn't into leaving. The bible tells us He will never leave or forsake us... and that nothing can separate us from the love of God.

I'm sad to say, I'm a list maker & a rule follower. (I know this shocks y'all.) So, where does that leave me? Simply, I think God is speaking to me, "forget your lists and love me." If I can just love God........ well, then I've got it. Don't I?

the one about the end of my trip to Guatemala

2009-02-02T19:22:00.005-06:00

::January 9th::

Wow. Ok. Woke up at 0530... snoozed until 0600. Got up, had diarrhea. Ha! Oh, gee. Again! (God is a kind being. I can go ahead and tell y'all He blessed me with an uneventful rest of the day - GI wise, anyway..) Went to breakfast at 0730 and headed to FS at 0800 to spend some times with the kids before we returned to Guatemala City.

:Craig & Esperanza:

My girls met me quickly. Kali, Sandra & Zulma. We played for a bit, took a bunch of photos, and just hung out.

:me & my girls:

:the group shot:

Group pics were next. (No WAY everyone is in that shot... do you see 90 kids in there?? hmm..) We only had 45-50 minutes with them because a clown was coming to see them at 9. Really. A clown. (I think that was God's timing... I sure wished I had someone to cheer me up after we left...Doesn't our great God think of every blessed thing?!) Once it came right down to saying goodbye, it was extremely hard. I was holding Maria when they announced it was time to go. I gave her hugs and kisses and told her I loved her.... and that I would see her next year. She gave me her awesome smile & I seriously considered taking her home to Texas with me..

:my little Maria:

Zulma was crying, as was Isabel, the pretty nursery worker. My tears started as I was hugging her. No short hugs today. Very tough.

When we left around 0915, everyone was pretty quiet. We didn't stop until the gas station with the Magnum bars - which the team is in love with, Craig especially. There was a homeless boy outside as we were standing around. I gave him my Pringles,

but what he needed was new shoes. :(

:on our way back:

We stopped and ate at Katok Restauraunt for lunch, then headed on. We got to the hotel about 4:30. We went to our rooms to drop our bags off, then Jill & I went to check email while Stevie headed to the workout room. Supper was at 6:30. Bread, then soup, chicken soft tacos & flan for dessert. Yum -- but too much!

Jill and I got cleaned up and watched TV together in our pajamas while all the boys went to a movie (in English), Yes Man. Stevie says it was pretty funny.. and the company was pretty silly, too. We get to sleep a lot more tonight -- YAY. Not leaving tomorrow for Antiqua until 10A!

Off to dream world on the better-than-Westin-bed!

********************************

::January 10th::

Got up around 0830-ish today and had breakfast - yummy french toast. We loaded up at 10, and moved out for Antigua! First stop was a gas station for a pit stop.. (& for more Magnum Bars - ha!) Then we went up to the path of the Cross. It's this scenic spot above Antigua that looks out over the whole city with mountains (& volcano) in the background.. This particular volcano is inactive and named el Agua. I'll have to look up the history of that when I get home.. something about a crater & water..

Then we went back down into Antigua to shop. Stevie changed some more money at the bank before we followed Felipe & Craig to the Jade factory/show room. We got a tour from the Manager, and learned a bit, too! Stevie & I got my sister a cute charm. I found some pretty earrings for myself - yay for shopping! Did you know that jade makes a ringing sound when you hit the stone?? cool. (Don't try this at home! They use that when they are mining jade, friends.)

After the Jade shop, we walked a few blocks to the Market. Eunice, our translator, took us to the back (where things are apparently less expensive..) so we could get our shop on. Most of the shop-keepers spoke plenty of English. We were surrounded by tons of colorful fabrics, bags, toys... you name it! Stevie & I got the rest of the gifts we needed at the market place. I must say, it was a fun place to shop! I even got to help Craig do some shopping for his beautiful wife & daughter!

When we got back to the hotel, we had a little time to re-organize. We cleaned up a bit, then met in the lobby. Buckner was treating us to a lovely dinner for our last night. I wasn't sure where we were going, but when I was offered steak or chicken (so they could call ahead & help the restaurant get ready for us) I knew it was going to be delish & my brain screamed, "go for the red meat, girl!!" :) As it turns out, the restaurant was beautiful... we had a private dining room with a balcony that looked out over all the city lights. So pretty. Our pictures just don't do it justice! Steak, potatoes... some veggies, and oh yes. I had dessert! Key lime pie. YUM. Stevie had something chocolate, and Jill went for the cheesecake with raspberry sauce. Sweet ending to a very sweet week.

We have to get up at a freakish hour on Sunday morning, so we're back at the hotel, packing up and debating whether it's worth it to let our heads hit the pillow. We feel so blessed to have come on this trip. It is truly through giving that we receive. Our time was given, but I know I received more than I gave. God be praised. I'm exhausted... physically. emotionally. I can't wait to see my friends & family. But I tell you what. I will never forget this week in Guatemala.

the one about the day i was sick

2009-01-30T20:16:00.005-06:00

Warning! In this post there will be mention of bodily functions.... If you can't handle it - well, I'm not sayin'. I'm just sayin'. (That was for you, Jayt!)

::January 7th::

7 AM: woke up, crampy. Thought, "I need to pee or pass gas. Not sure which." Got to the bathroom only to discover that my body was rejecting/quickly getting rid of something. That's right. Diarrhea. Lower GI distress. No bueno. Non-violent, but uncomfortable & frustrating nonetheless. :( And so, I don't think going to work in la clinica is a good idea today. Something about running... RUNNING.. to a bathroom in this condition just doesn't seem right...

It appears they are going to leave me here at Hotel Premiere, locked in my room, working on finishing the scrapbook for Seniora Sandra. I feel bad because so many of the kids asked me about 'tomorrow' last night. It's like they knew I'd be missing... :( Sad. Oh yeah -- Zulma told me yesterday that she loves me. :) And I told her I love her! Maybe this will clear up & I can go with them later...

****************************************

::January 8th::

And so, I had ongoing GI distress (ha! that almost makes it sound pleasant. as IF!) until 7:45 PM yesterday. That's when I finally gave up on it 'running' its course. I had finished the scrapbook by 1030, then I spent the rest of the day watching TV and moving quickly to the bathroom as needed. Stevie came back in the afternoon to be with me. We chilled together and he was impressed by some of the noises my body was making. (what a BOY)

About 7 PM the group left for Sandra's to have dinner. Stevie & Jill really wanted me to go (and I cried b/c I really wanted to but knew I couldn't), but I opted to stay at the Hotel. Good thing, too, because about 8 o'clock I got fever and chills. I = miserable.

God is good. I slept all night & haven't had any diarrh.... (you know) since about 8PM. Praise the Lord.

Today we got up. Got ready. I was weak from only ingesting like 800 calories yesterday.. so Stevie held my arm up while I curled my hair AND went to bring my breakfast up while I did my make-up in bed. Good MAN! (Bless you, Stevie! I really love you, hon.)

The bus got to FS @ about 0915. We played, the girls asked me where I'd been the day before... we played some more, got my hair braided by about 6 kids at once.. then the group that was going to the mountains loaded up and headed out.

(In this picture, I'm sitting on a chair made of tires. They wanted me to sit and relax since I'd been sick. They held me & braided my hair. SO sweet...)

I was with the babies for about an hour, and when they all passed out we went to lunch. Felipe had taxis take us to McDonald's -- possibly the nicest McD's I've ever been to... and then we went to the city square and walked around a while. We ended up walking all the way back to FS.. well pretty much. Austin (guy on our team) and our driver came and picked us up about 3 blocks away. Ha.

Once we got back, we played some. Then we worked on making supper - mac 'n 'cheese & hot dogs. I've never seen so many hot dogs & noodles in one place. We ate- then Stevie, Jill & I went to see the babies before the special show the kids were all putting on for us. Maria was so cute - they all were! She wanted us to see her shoes... black patent! (tres chic!)

The show was precious. Each age group did a little skit. Then they blessed us and presented us with gifts. Kali made a bee-line for me! :) Very sweet. Made me feel very special, and I was crying tears I'd been holding back. We saw a slideshow, then gave them their gifts and some fireworks. The glow bracelets were a hit!! Our final act of the evening.

Now we're all packed and ready to go. We're going back to FS in the morning to say *gulp* goodbye.

Lord, help us.

clogged sinuses

2009-01-30T17:14:00.005-06:00

Well, I'm sick & in bed, so here is more of my Guatemalan adventure:

::January 6th::

Again, breakfast @ 0800. Mas cafe con leche y pancakes.. then went and sent out an extremely brief email to a select few. Upon arrival @ Fundacion, I was greeted by Kali and Erasmo - they hardly let go of my hands. We played for a very few minutes, then we had some songs & split youth/vbs again. The lesson in youth was "love" - what the word means, what it means that God is love & what the Bible says about it. They watched a video about God's love, and then they got a love letter with scripture references about how God loves them.

:Stevie & I before loading up to go to the Ruins:

:everybody lining up:

Right about 1130, we got loaded up to go to the Ruins. (They just happen to have ancient ruins down the street from Fundacion - lucky!) There, we took a bunch of pics, played, had pizza... Jill and I got out our nail polish & went to town on many mini-manicures. BIG hit. Even Stevie & a few of the boys came over and got one nail painted! Very cool surroundings for a manicure, I must say. (I remember Craig calling Kevin - our Youth minister back home whose wife was due to have baby #3 any day.. No baby @ that point. When Kevin asked how we were doing, Craig responded 'well, I'm sitting here on some ancient ruins watching Jenny & Jill paint nails - it's a pretty good day.') (A good day, indeed.)

:a shot of some ruins with mountains in the background:

:Esperanza and I atop the ruins:

:the kids (and team) playing on some of the ruins:

:Kali showing off her pretty nails:

Back to Fundacion for la clinica. We saw all the babies today. (I only made one cry.. Isaiah. Let's just say it isn't hard to make that cute little boy cry..) Some others & some workers. 21 in all. Jonathan was the only one with a procedure today. One wart on his L arm. He didn't cry at all! We were so proud of him.

After clinic, Jill/Stevie/I cleaned up the classroom with some help from one of the interpreters. I went to help clean up in the kitchen after checking out Zulma's room (one of the little girls who became a fast friend). I was told by Craig that a kid was seizing, so I ran to the office. Jill and Dr Pat were already there, and Saolo was coming out of it. Poor guy. :( Luckily, there was no further 'medical' excitement after that.

We went straight to Pollo Campero for dinner - a fast food chicken joint - muy popular. Craig prepped us & has been talking to us for WEEKS about Pollo Campero. Funny. It was pretty good, but I might be missing out by having ordered the strips.

We went to the Guatemalan wal-mart after dinner and got a few things. Once, Jill and I looked at each other and noted that we were being stared at like freaks of nature. We were the only blondes in there, that's for sure!

Back to the Hotel Premiere then, and we helped Felipe work on a scrapbook for Senora Sandra (she runs the Fundacion). Then a hot shower - thank you, Jesus! - and here we are!

I am so freaking tired.

But.

I am SO happy.

Hasta Manana!

more sharing

2009-01-29T17:20:00.004-06:00

::January 5th::

Up around 0715, breakfast at 0800 (pancakes y cafe) & devotional by Craig around 0900. Then loaded up & headed over to the Fundacion. Again, tons of kids lining the sidewalks, waving. I was immediately grabbed by Kali and Erasmo, my BFFs. We had a welcome, some songs & then split into 3/4 year olds, VBS group & Youth. Jil and I went to help Viviana & Julian (a couple from Colombia) work with the Youth. Stevie helped with a group for VBS. To say these kids love him (my sweet husband) might be the understatement of the century. :) Ok, our lesson in Youth was on self-esteem & what that means. (Autoestima en espanol!) Parts were hard and some parts I didn't understand, but for the most part my espanol held its own!

Around noon, the kids had lunch & the team ate together. Then we got set up for clinica & had that all afternoon. Each child came in, got a picture taken, & came over and got their height/weight checked (that was my station). Then, Jill did vital signs, and sent each kiddo on to see Dr Pat. We got through 41 of them today and Stevie only filled 4 or 5 scripts. One little guy... very, very brave guy! He had a couple warts burned off of his forehead by Dr Pat. He was so tough! Even when he cried, he stayed very still! Stevie picked him up and held him while he calmed down afterward. :) So sweet.

:me checking Eric's height:

:Jill in action:

:Stevie in his farmacia:

Jill & I then went back to Youth for an hour to learn about/discuss more regarding raising/lowering one's self-esteem. My group was pretty quiet, but Fernanda opened up quite a bit. I like her. :)

From there, we went straight to the Nursery to take over so the workers could be treated to a special dinner. How cool is that?! I think we had 6 toddlers & 4 babies. All so cute, all so good. Stevie came in as another helper & joked that if Jill didn't take Maria home, we would. She has an amazing smile & is happier than any other toddler I've ever encountered. Fed all of them, changed them & put everyone to bed. 2 hours later, the workers were home. They were all just giddy with the treat of 'going out'!! (BTW - the older kiddos watched Cars while we had nursery time.) I believe we were there 13 hours today... I'm exhausted. Pooped!

So, now it's 2300. Time to go to sleep & then have another day juntos!! (together)

Tomorrow: mas clinica

las ruinas y pizza!

sharing

2009-01-28T07:52:00.006-06:00

:my journal:

While we were in Guatemala, Craig really encouraged us to journal each night. We just did SO much every day, it would be impossible to recall it all without having journaled about it... So, I've decided I'd like to share my journaling from the trip. I think that's the best way to really share with you what I experienced & what our schedule was like.

Enjoy! But forgive my occasional & random words in Spanish... I can't help it.

::January 4, 2009::

:Jill & I in the Houston airport:

I'm in Guatemala in a village called Huehuetenango. Stevie & I (along with Craig, Jill, and Nancy B.) are here with Buckner Ministries serving at a local orphanage - Fundacion Salvacion. We flew out of Houston yesterday at 1115. At 1400, we were landing in Guatemala City! Only had two bouts of anxiety on the plane -- one at take-off, one at landing...

We went from the terminal through immigracion & were then driven to the hotel - Vista Real - VERY nice. (Looking back, I'm not sure how all of us fit in the van sent by the hotel. It was pretty comical, and I'm pretty sure that's where we all started bonding as a team!) Awesome staff, amazing room. Freaking awesome bed - really! SO cozy. (more comfortable than the Westin 'heavenly bed') Stevie & I had a corner room with a King bed, an alcove with a chandelier, table & two chairs & three windows (to take in the gorgeous view). The room had vaulted ceilings & hardwood beams... crazy nice bathroom. We had a late lunch, toured the grounds, then had dinner. I fell asleep at about 2130 while Stevie watched the Colts vs. Chargers.

:Stevie & I - Dinner at Vista Real:

:countryside:

In the AM, we had breakfast at 0600, a devotional at 0700,, then headed for Huehue @ 0730. Can't say I loved the 6 1/2 hour ride, but the van was comfy & I was surrounded by great company... and by the way, there is no greeting/welcome like the one we received at Fundacion Salvacion. I knew within the first hour there that part of my heart would be staying in Guatemala. God is here. He abounds in the very mouths & hearts of the workers here. These kids have a chance & are illuminated by all the love poured out on them here. Coming off the bus, the kids were ALL smiles (some a little tentative..) and they hugged and welcomed us. Within seconds of stepping onto the pavement I had a new BFF, Kali. Another quick bud (within mere minutes) was Erasmo. He's 12, she's 7. Both SO sweet. I have pictures already with Kali & Johanna, Irma, and little Maria, so I need to be sure and have some photo-ops with Erasmo before we go. By the way, little Maria has the BEST smile on Earth.

:Jill & I with our new BFFs:

When they did the welcome, some of the kids brought in balloons & then popped them as our surprise. :) We spent a few hours on the playground, then we prayed over the leader, Sandra. Then back to Hotel Premiere (not near the par of Vista Real...but absolutely fine) for dinner. (Oops, we had lunch there earlier. Forgot to mention that!) We unloaded just after dark & had fajitas for supper. Yum.

I am beyond glad that I don't have to get up so early tomorrow! Breakfast at 0800, then another day at Fundacion. Another day in God's presence....

Molly Helm

2009-01-26T17:54:00.004-06:00

Laura - Sorry to copy your blog background, but it was too cute not to! :)

And now, I would like to introduce the newest Helm: Molly! She came to live with us Sunday. A bit timid at first, she seems all warmed up to us now! She has met her Aunt Jenny C, Aunt Jill, Kyle, and Aunt Erin. She is the sweetest thing, though she has a bit of a passive aggressive streak (just like me!). At one point today when Erin was over, they were playing so hard! I laughed so much & so hard that I cried. I didn't think a little girl like Molly could move that fast. She is an 8 year old Beagle that we adopted through Hound Rescue of central Texas. Feel free to check out their website at houndrescue.com -- they have some super cute doggies with super cute bios!

Peeking around the ottoman

tolerating my picture taking

humoring me & posing a bit

my favorite: Molly making herself at home

s & s

2009-01-23T13:30:00.004-06:00

Had to be up early this morning for an Neonatal Resuscitation recert... I know! Thanks, God, that I don't have to take any more tests for a while!! But to make up for the early hour, He blessed me with two beautiful things:

Starbucks & Sunrise (reflected in the storefront windows... so pretty!)

Here is a pic I took with my phone!

gifts

2009-01-20T16:40:00.002-06:00

I passed PALS on Saturday.. I had a headache all afternoon secondary to increased blood pressure & stress leading up to the exam and practical, but it's done! Thank you, Lord, for your presence.

Thank you so much for your prayers. You guys have no idea how much they helped. We did the written exam, then had lunch provided. After lunch was the practical. Normally, when I'm nervous, I can't eat b/c it makes me nauseous. However, your prayers washed over me. God gave me a calm that allowed me to really focus & allowed me to eat! What a bonus!!

So, the song I posted the other day... I hope y'all were able to find & listen to it. When I came across it on iTunes, it immediately affected me. I was in the midst of a pseudo-depression having just gotten back from Guatemala.. totally unsure what to do with some of the emotions I was having. I was also dealing with some pretty intense anxiety related to that PALS exam.

Then God spoke to me through this song, "I'll be by your side wherever you fall, in the dead of night whenever you call, and please don't fight these hands that are holding you. My hands are holding you. Cause I, I love you. I want you to know that I, I love you. I'll never let you go."

Y'all may have noticed by now that I'm intensely impacted by music. I think it may be one of the most profound ways God speaks to me... gets my attention... stops me in my tracks.

God, I want to thank you right now for the gift of music in my life. I wish I had a better singing voice, but I think part of the reason you gave me an average voice was so I would listen more & close my mouth. :) I praise you for the messages you send me in song - for the way they influence and impact me. Thank you for the gift of hearing. Continue to guide me, Father. I need you. Thank you for remaining by my side, ever faithful. Thank you that you'll never let me go.. that you'll be by my side wherever I fall, in the dead of night whenever I call. Help me to quit struggling against your mighty hands. Thank you so much for holding me! Bless you, Jesus, for redeeming me. I was destined for eternity with you. Pour out your love on each of my blog-readers right now, Father. They need you, too. Send your grace. We praise you for your mercy! I love you & Pray in Jesus' almighty name.

Amen.

song from God to you

2009-01-18T00:42:00.003-06:00

"By Your Side"

by Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving in these days?

Why are you trying to earn grace?

Why are you crying?

Let me lift up your face

Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love?

Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?

To where will you go, child?

Tell me, where will you run?

To where will you run?

..chorus..

'Cause I'll be by your side

Wherever you fall

In the dead of night

Whenever you call

and please don't fight

these hands that are holdin' you

My hands are holdin' you

Look at these hands and my side

They swallowed the grave on that night

When I drank the world's sin

so I could carry you in

and give you life

I wanna give you life

..chorus..

'Cause I.. I love you.. I want you to know

That I.. I love you.. I'll never let you go

..chorus..

PALS - prayer request

2009-01-17T06:20:00.003-06:00

Alright. Today is the day!

I take the PALS (pediatric advanced life support) test & practical today. My gut is twisting as I type. I'm nervous! The written exam is at 1120. After lunch, I have to do 2 practicals as a 'team leader'.

Please, please pray for recall of all vital information. Also pray that during my practicals I'll be able to calmly think through each process, assign all needed duties, and that I'll verbalize each thing they need to hear to pass me. :)

I'll let y'all know how it goes - hopefully by telling you how I celebrated! :)

and on we go!

2009-01-14T10:20:00.003-06:00

When I say that Stevie & I got back from Guatemala and hit the ground running, I mean we seriously hit the ground running. I'd love nothing more than to sit here and blog endlessly about our trip to Huehuetenango, but I've got a test to study for - a PALS certification this weekend & NRP recert next weekend! Yikes! I'm pretty afraid of this PALS exam, so if y'all would please say a prayer (or 2 or 3) for me that would be AwEsOmE! The quicker I can get past these exams, the sooner I can blog ALL about our amazing trip to Guatemala! :)

10 things

2008-12-31T01:14:00.004-06:00

Tagged again! Man -- what fun!

So, Jenny C. wrote about 10 things people may not know about her. It seems I've been challenged to do the same. Forgive me, I love these things... We were just talking about this in my session (at the gym) today! I hope I haven't done this one before or all 6 of you who read my blog are gonna head for the hills! Don't leave me! I love you guys!

1. I grew up with cats & dogs, and I always considered myself a cat person. However, the love of my life is allergic to cats, and I probably won't ever have another one. :( LB, my last cat before I got married, was THE best cat ever & had the most relaxing purr in the world.

2. I am an organizing freak. I love such places as The Container Store or even just the organizing aisles at Target or WalMart.. I often choose projects that involve organizing (re-doing a closet/organizing cabinets) before doing anything else around the house.

3. I have now lost 3 nails on 3 different toes. Two were lost with soccer being the culprit. One, I lost just this Fall for no apparent reason.

4. I'm still shocked when God chooses to use me.

5. I love to read. Fiction is my favorite! Though, Stevie tries really hard to get me into non-fiction -- it just ain't happening!

6. I, like Jenny C., waited until I was married to have sex. It may sound cliche, but it was definitely worth the wait! My husband waited, too. I can't tell you what that has meant for our relationship!

7. Of four children in my family, three of us were born on 7's. 7 was always my 'lucky number', and it's also the number I wanted for my soccer jersey each season.

8. I'm not sure if I want children. God & I are talking this through..

9. My sister-in-law & I met a long time ago when I was dating her ex-boyfriend. We weren't friends then.... we are friends now. I love her so much & I'm glad we're sisters!

10. I only have one dimple -- on the right side of my smile. :)

Tagged!

2008-12-23T09:59:00.005-06:00

Dianna tagged me... so here we go! I hope I can think of all the 8's required! ;)

8 shows I watch -- Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, House MD, Dirty Sexy Money, Brothers & Sisters (I watch these online)... that's all I got! Sorry. I think it's probably a great thing that I can only think of 5 shows I watch. If I actually had cable this list would be SO much longer.

8 favorite restaurants -- Texican Cafe, Cafe 1626, Chipotle, Jason's Deli, Chic-fil-A, Carino's, Fire Bowl Cafe, Salt Lick

8 things that happened today -- (Well, I'm changing this to yesterday b/c I'm a slacker and just haven't been up long!) Got up & got ready for work, delivered a gift as a secret Santa, delivered a gift as a friend, got report as charge nurse, deleted leftover pages from charge nurse pager, changed the pager alert to "chirp & vibrate", opened the most delicious candle I've ever smelled (gift from Patricia - YUM, thank YOU!), watched 2 online episodes of House with Stevie

8 things I look forward to -- Jesus coming back, Christmas in 2 days (!), my 6th anniversary, hugging my parents and telling them happy 30th anniversary :), getting a beagle next month, seeing my friends at work later today, our mission trip to Guatemala, my next Helm House Creations event

8 things I wish for -- a thriving Women's ministry at MBC, saving grace every day, shaplier calves (ha!), a dog for Stevie & I that won't chew on furniture or pee on carpet, for Pharmacy school to be paid off, for my siblings to be in happy, fulfilling relationships, awesome-big hair that doesn't require so much product, for my parents to never die

I'm tagging Melanie, Jenny C, Laura, Julie, Shelah & Ryan! (Sorry if Dianna already tagged one or both of you!) I look forward to reading your posts! :)

my Hero

2008-12-22T21:13:00.004-06:00

Do I know that Jesus Christ left his throne to come to Earth? To be born into beyond humble circumstances? Do I know that He could have come with all the glory that He deserves? That he could have ridden in on a white horse that day? Do I know that I don't deserve His love? That I don't deserve His having given up one split second of hearing His own praises sung?? Do I know that He was sacrificing SO much, every second He was on Earth - not just on the cross.. Because He loves me & wanted to save me?

Absolutely.

Do I lose track of that with ridiculous, unforgivable regularity?

Unfortunately, yes.

I came across this song on iTunes tonight... just browsing. I feel like God used it to remind me of the depth of His love for me. I hope you'll check it out. I love you guys - Merry, Merry Christmas! Praise you, Lord, for birthing yourself into our realm to save us from what we deserve. You are my unlikely hero. My perfect Savior.

"How Many Kings"

downhere

Follow the Star to a place unexpected

Would you believe after all we've projected

A child in a manger?

Lowly and small, the weakest of all

Unlikeliest hero, wrapped in his mother's shawl

Just a child - is this who we've waited for?

..'cause

..Chorus..

How many Kings step down from their thrones?

How many Lords have abandoned their homes?

How many greats have become the least for me?

How many Gods have poured out their hearts

To romance a world that is torn all apart?

How many fathers gave up their sons for me?

Bringing our gifts for the newborn Savior

All that we have whether costly or meek

Because we believe

Gold for his honor, and frankincense for his pleasure

And myrrh for the cross he will suffer

Do you believe?

Is this who we've waited for?

..Chorus..

All for me..

All for you..

..Chorus..